Britney Spears is a Femme Fatale

Here’s Britney Spears, working the stage for allll it’s worth on her Femme Fatale tour. I don’t know how much tickets cost, but if I could get close enough to get a good view of that ass, I’d sure as hell fork over the damn money. And those tits to top it all off? Where [...]

Harry Potter & The Deathly Hallows (Part 2): Film Review

Harry Potter & The Deathly Hallows (Part 2): Film Review

So, unless you’re a witch-fearing fundamentalist or an illiterate, you have known for a few years now exactly how the saga of Harry Potter (a.k.a. The Boy Who Lived) ends. Having generated literally billions in revenue for author J.K. Rowling, Scholastic Books, and Warner Bros., the release of the final film marks the end of the most lucrative film franchise in the history of the medium. We likely won’t see another such phenomenon for a few generations, at least. (Note to Twilight fans: don’t flame me).

What this all boils down to is the plain fact that the last film had better be a good one: and I don’t mean passable-as-popcorn-entertainment-but-really-not-memorable good – it had better be on par with the best fantasy movies out there, the kind delivered to audiences by George Lucas, Disney, and Mr. Spielberg himself.

So what’s the verdict? Part 2 of The Deathly Hallows is indeed quite good – in fact, it’s intermittently excellent – which should satisfy everyone but the purest of literary purists (who, quite frankly, shouldn’t even bother with the movies in the first place). We see the heroic trio of Harry, Ron and Hermione fully come of age, realizing that their purpose in the world is to clean up the messes created by wayward adults who crave Purity, Allegiance, Wealth and Absolute Power. Harry and Co. simply want to coexist with Muggles and use magic for good . . . why Voldemort doesn’t understand this is one of Rowling’s great accomplishments as a writer.

But director David Yates doesn’t bestow his arch-villain with that degree of depth or existential introspection. Rather, Voldemort is played as he has always been played throughout the franchise: as a cunning (but shallow) shadow whose hatred of Harry is as expansive as it is inscrutable. Yates and his screenwriters have written the film as a nonstop action adventure, in clear juxtaposition to the deliberately paced Part 1 (which, in my opinion, stands as the best film of all eight).

The final film is careful to include all the series’s most memorable characters: Dumbledore, Snape, the Weasleys, Hagrid, and all those nasty Death Eaters. You shouldn’t go in expecting a faithful retelling of the final half of the seventh Potter narrative. The filmmakers have packed the movie with chases and wand wars, which, if the track record of the previous seven films is any indication, is precisely right as far as audiences are concerned.

The Deathly Hallows Part 2 will be the monstrously huge blockbuster that everyone expects it to be; it will also be a satisfying conclusion for most fans. Many will be sad to see Harry, Ron and Hermione fade away into cinematic history (even as they barely age in the movie in what is puproted to be a flash into the future) . . . some will feel compelled to bury themselves in the books one more time to re-exeperience that unforgettable magic of reading the tale of Harry Potter . . . and still others (probably studio executives) will mourn the sacrifice of this undying cash cow. Which all goes to prove one thing: Harry Potter is the definitive legend of the modern age, one which speaks to the hope that goodness – no matter how feeble or naive, no matter how inexperienced or outmatched – will always triumph in the face of adversity. Always.

Well, Ms. Rowling, you can’t do better than that.

Horrible Bosses: Review

It’s been a bad summer for super hero movies: Green Lantern, Thor, and X-Men and all bombed. It’s also been a rather disappointing summer for the summer cinematic staple: sequels! Hangover 2, Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides and Cars 2 didn’t exactly regale audiences the way their makers may have intended.

What it has been, however, is a good summer for comedies: first Bridesmaids came out, making everyone awaken to the fact that, hey, women are funny – I mean so FUNNY that I have to use all caps and italics to stress just how funny they can really be. And now comes Horrible Bosses, not quite as entertaining as Bridesmaids but still a jolly good time for anyone who doesn’t mind throwing away $12.50, 90 minutes of their lifespan, and mainstream logic out the window in the name of cinematic farce.

The one thing everyone will be able to agree upon is the idea that Horrible Bosses is this year’s Hangover: it even out-Hangovers the underperforming Hangover sequel by a good few yards.

What exactly do I mean? Well, it makes us laugh at a terribly common scenario by sprinkling new and bizarre idiosyncrasies into a situation that everyone can relate to. Who hasn’t had a boss they detested with every bit of their biological fiber? Or had a boss you thought may have been the model for Michael Scott on The Office? Hating your boss is a universal, time-honored tradition ‘

Jennifer Love Hewitt found a somewhat cute and flattering outfit links

I think Jennifer Love Hewitt looks kind of good here. [The Blemish]
Rachel McAdams & Michael Sheen are normal, sweet together. [LaineyGossip]
Michelle Bachmann is officially running for prez! Iowa numbers look good. [Gawker]
Has Gerard Butler waxed his chest?!? [Dlisted]
Liz Hurley busted her ass falling down some steps. [Yeeeah]
Christopher Meloni will be in Superman! [Pajiba]
Mariah’

Kelly Slater Surfin’ Up Brazil

Kelly Slater

Kelly Slater

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Photo by BrainPix/BuzzFoto.com

The surfing world is heating up in Brazil!
The Ten-time ASP world champion Kelly Slater took the highest score in the ASP Billabong Rio Pro on Tuesday at Arpoador Beach in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil.
Slater, who posted a 9.00 midway through his round and finished with a 15.17, was cutting it close.

Kim Kardashian Maintains Herself

Kim Kardashian was spotted getting what looks like her daily mani-pedi (that’s short for manicure-pedicure). I don’t mind so long as I get a good peek at that rack. Granted, it sure as hell isn’t as good as a bikini photoshoot, but hey, you’ve gotta take what you can get. And I don’t know WHAT [...]

Happy Birthday Fergie

Now Black Eyed Peas singer Fergie is a chick who knows how to celebrate her birthday: she did it up in VEGAS, baby! With those girls propped up and pushed out like they are, I’m sure she had a damn good time, too. (And no hubby Josh Duhamel in sight. Well, he has his strippers, [...]